At this point my sister had stepped up and offered me a room and space to store ‘stuff’ and a place to park the bus when I wanted to have a break from being on the road. This was gratefully accepted and gave me a little relief from the “Oh my goodness what the heck am I doing” that seemed to be hitting every second night at 1:30am.
Since the separation I had been renting a small house and now I had to reduce my ‘stuff’ even more. The amount of ‘stuff’ that I had gotten rid of between the separation and the new house was amazing but I had still almost a house full. Sofa, kitchen table and chairs, tv, fridge, washing machine, desk, chairs, lawn mower etc. Stuff that I had no need of while in the bus. What to store, what to sell, what to give away?
I made the decision that I didn’t want to put stuff into storage, I didn’t want to have to pay for dead space. So everything that wasn’t essential to the bus and my life on the road was going.
All these decisions were really starting to wind me up and made me really consider what I was doing.
Why was I doing this, was it because everyone else thought it was a good idea? No this was my dream from a long time ago and the opportunity was here so I was going to at least give it a try. If things didn’t work out, well what would I lose? Absolutely not very much. The bus would go back up for sale and I would have to find somewhere to live again. No big deal really in the grand scheme of things. So why am I waking up at 1:30am every second morning worrying?
Most people don’t like change, need to feel anchored and have roots so I believe that it is normal to have fears. How to cope with those fears and not end up frozen and unable to move.
Time and time I have had to talk myself into the fact that I have a fall back plan if it all goes wrong, but mostly I have an awesome family, friends and workmates behind me who are extremely supportive of what I am doing. The old adage of “How can you soar with the eagles, when you are surrounded by turkeys” is so true. Don’t surround yourself with people who do not support you. Think positively, make a plan, set goals, write it all down and make it happen.
While this was all happening I was desperately trying to come up with a name for my new home. There were all the usual suspects, Roaming Away, Retyrement Home, One For The Road, but nothing seemed right until I thought about some of the nicknames that my family had given me.
One that came to mind was Uncle Fredrock. My niece had lost her husband in a tragic incident and I had been her ‘rock’ during this time and she had given me the nickname of Uncle Fredrock. Also at the time of my 45th birthday I was in Orlando, Florida where I was taken out to dinner at the Hardrock Café at Universal Studios. A memorable evening with an interesting celebratory shot of Platinum Patron Tequila. Something like $US45 a shot, smooth as with a heck of a delayed kick. So between the two and a bit of a tribute to Fred Flintstone, the idea of “The Fredrock Café” came to life.